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Baby Boomers: Four Questions to Ask Your Parents

Four important questions to ask your aging parents.

It turns out that the parents of baby boomers—the silent generation—may still be living up to their name. Recent research reveals that only 28 percent of boomers’ parents say they regularly discuss money and finances with their family, and 41 percent feel they haven’t discussed their financial situation adequately with their children.1 So the responsibility may fall on boomers to approach their aging parents about money-related issues. Whether your parents are only a few years into retirement or more elderly these four questions are a good starting point for important financial conversations.

1. What do you want? If your parents are hesitant to open up about their finances, this may be a good place to begin. Ask them what they want and expect for the future—financially or in general. Gently inquire about the legacy they want to leave, including their wishes for their home, other property and valuable possessions, as well as any charitable causes they’d like to support. Your parents may be reluctant to discuss these things, and might not have even thought about some of them. Reassure them of the value in communicating now while both parties are still able.

2. Have you thought about long-term care? Perhaps the most important part of this conversation is understanding your parents’ wishes if they can no longer care for themselves physically. Begin by asking if they expect to live in an assisted living facility or nursing home, or if they hope to live with family under these circumstances. Be sure your own expectations and abilities are communicated if they choose the latter, or if you may need to pitch in financially to support their medical needs. Ensure you and your parents understand their health insurance and Medicaid benefits, and ask if they have any type of long-term care coverage.

3. What do I need know? Be sure you know where your parents store their important financial and legal documents and if they have a will or written power of attorney in place. Ask for contact information for any financial and legal professionals they’ve worked with along the way, and confirm you have the updated contact information for extended family members who you may need to reach in the future.

4. Is your retirement income still sufficient? It’s possible that your parents may be struggling to make their retirement savings last. They may have lived to be an older age than they expected when they retired, could be facing expensive health care bills, or their investments may have been affected by the recession. Being aware of their financial situation can help you both set expectations for the future.

Having these conversations with your aging parents can be difficult, but often the biggest challenge is approaching them in a way that encourages honest dialogue among multiple family members. Consider working with a financial professional who can help facilitate these and other conversations while keeping your overall financial plan and goals in mind.

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Due to industry regulations, I cannot respond to your questions and comments underneath my blog, but please feel free to contact me directly via email at Steven.B.Gross@ampf.com or via phone at 914-923-6490 ext. 310.This communication is published in the United States for residents of New York only; and this advisor is licensed only in the states of PA, CT, MD, GA, NJ, NC, FL, MA, ME

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Mike Valenti May 19, 2013 at 03:57 pm
The damage done by the prior BOE majority has begun a cycle of meaningful healing under the currentRead More BOE majority. Continued...
Mike Valenti May 19, 2013 at 03:16 pm
The damage done by the prior BOE majority has begun a cycle of meaningful healing under the currentRead More BOE majority. Continued...
Mike Valenti May 19, 2013 at 03:02 pm
This year’s school budget is a REDUCTION in spending by the district versus last year’sRead More budget. We are the ONLY district in Westchester to forward a reduction for our community to vote on. The reason we will slightly violate the tax-cap is due to the fiscal irresponsibility of a prior board using fund balance to cushion the budget and create the illusion of a cap-compliant budget. Please join me in re-electing Jon Satran and Sal Maglietta. Please also join me in voting YES on this year’s school budget.
Mike Valenti May 19, 2013 at 02:53 pm
Mr. Linder, This is YOUR post folks are responding to and your ideas. I find it curious at bestRead More that you began a public forum comment blog but advocate throughout your responses that the discussion should be taken off-line and out of public view. this really doesn't position you well as an advocate for transparency.
Sonny (Louis) Linder May 18, 2013 at 05:07 pm
CORRECTION TO LAST POST: The last sentence should read: "Let's continue to share, butRead More face-to-face." Thx - Sonny
Sonny (Louis) Linder May 18, 2013 at 06:06 am
Thanks, Jon - you raise important considerations and in a calm, dispassionate way, which IRead More appreciate. As for alternative funding mechanisms, in hindsight I believe they should have been examined and addressed this earlier this year had the decision-making been opened up to the public in a completely bidirectional manner much earlier in this year's budget cycle. A real take-away from this situation, in my opinion, is that we in the community were not given the opportunity to sit down together with sharpened pencils in a public forum and allowed to vet and actually challenge the Administration's assumptions in order to arrive at budget alternatives with the Administration and Board. The comparison you make with Washington is indeed apt in that it reflects the way decisions have slid back to being made in a vacuum and handed down to the voters instead of in a democratic fashion based on budget-to-actuals instead of budget-to-budget figures combined with the practice of over-reserving for expense items while under-estimating revenues. Although the Board did indeed reach out to me and 2 others asking for suggestions, when we re-iterated our request for an open meeting format to include other financially savvy community members, these requests were consistently ignored. Which is why we are in the current position we are in having to decide on Tues on a tax levy cap-busting budget requiring 60% super-majority. Which the public will decide, of course, and we will live with the consequences: either it passes, or the Board and Administration will be forced to rein in the excesses. And much as I love open debate, I restate that online posting leaves does leave a lot to be desired. Let's continue to share, but not face-to-face. Respectfully - Sonny
JanFisher May 17, 2013 at 10:55 pm
It is so wonderful that, recognizing the importance of STEM and following the recommendation of ourRead More educators, Sal Maglietta and Jon Satran agreed to bring on the district's first director of instructional technology.
McKey Rivers May 10, 2013 at 07:36 pm
Thank you Dr. Sternberg for your thoughtful letter. You hit on an important facet of this electionRead More few if any others have stated: electing Mr. Wasserman and/or Mr. Linder will provide the added benefit of diversity of thought as the Board continues to address difficult, ongoing educational and financial issues. There is a woeful absence of synergy produced by articulation of different views among the current Board members. The absence of a “check and balance” on the current Board is reflected in the inexplicable decision to cancel the May 13 BOE meeting (scheduled since last summer), which is the last meeting prior to the May 21 budget vote and board election. Is there no business for the Board to conduct at this critical juncture or could it be that the Board does not want Briarcliff residents to hear members of the community question the Board about the proposed budget right before the election? Electing either Mr. Linder and/or Mr. Wasserman will immediately benefit the public as the highest vote getter will be seated on May 22 and thus participate in formulating a second budget for public vote that, notwithstanding current BOE scare tactics, can be tax levy compliant and not involve additional program elimination or reduction. There is no doubt that electing Mr. Wasserman and/or Mr. Linder to the Briarcliff School Board will substantially benefit the entire Briarcliff community and provide a much needed check on Board decision making.
Herman Sexton May 10, 2013 at 03:48 pm
Electing Paul Wasserman alone would add a diversity of thought. The guy hears at least a dozenRead More voices in his head. Have you ever spoken to him? Did you pay attention when he was running for Congress for a few weeks? Ugh.